I met Jonty, originally from the Bay of Plenty, while he was staying at my place in Wellington for a couple of nights. One of those nights he passed out drunk on the couch. He woke up to someone trying to take his shoes off, started swinging a bat at my girlfriend, and went back to sleep holding the bat like an absolute madman. He approaches most of his life with a masochistic attitude, carrying GIB up and down stairs till knock off and then going out and skating till he’s beaten. His permanent back scabs have gotten even bigger and he’s stacked a clip. Always down for a skate, always down for buying boxes for the boys at the park, always down for the Cheapies bench and always down for a couple of very heated rounds of bowling. Onya Jonesman.

First published in Manual #65, June 2017.